Do It Yourself Eye Surgery

Here’s an account I’d like to work on. DIY eye surgery (for the less fortunate):

Affordable In-Home LASIK Surgery You Can Do Yourself!
In the past, LASIK surgery was an expensive procedure that could only be performed by skilled professionals in a doctor’s office or eye clinic. Often costing upwards of $1000 per eye, LASIK was beyond the reach of most Americans.
Now the revolutionary LASIK@Home system makes clear vision affordable for everyone.
The Complete LASIK@Home Kit (patent pending) includes everything you need to complete the procedure:
Scal-Pal™ Hand-Operated Combination Femtosecond/Excimer Laser
Mild sedative (diazepam 4mg)
No-Blink™ brand Eye Drops
Detailed Instructions and QuickStart Guide
Protective Post-Op Sleep Mask

Learn more about how you can cut your own eye open at Lasik @ Home.
Oh, and by the way: what do you think about those No-Blink™ brand Eye Drops? Perfect for liars or hardcore Clockwork Orange fans.